Grief Without a Funeral

What No One Tells You About Moving Abroad

Why homesickness isn’t just missing home but it’s mourning the invisible losses.

When people talk about moving abroad, they often focus on the excitement, opportunity, and adventure. But beneath that, many expats experience something far less talked about: a quiet, persistent sadness. A longing. A disorientation.

This feeling has a name: ambiguous loss a kind of grief without closure, without a clear ending, and without a funeral.

What Is Ambiguous Loss?

Ambiguous loss happens when something important is gone, but not completely. It’s the kind of grief that arises when we lose pieces of our lives or identities that aren’t tangible.

For expats, this can include:

• Not being part of daily family life anymore

• Losing shared language, inside jokes, cultural rhythms

• Feeling like you don’t fully belong anywhere

• Watching your old friendships fade while new ones feel fragile

• Letting go of the version of yourself that existed “back home”

This isn’t just about missing your favorite food or weather, it’s about the invisible, emotional layers of life you’ve had to leave behind.

Why Does This Happen?

Moving abroad involves more than just logistics. It requires emotional and psychological adaptation. Your nervous system is adjusting to change, your identity is being re-shaped, and your inner compass is trying to recalibrate in a new environment. All of this can feel disorienting, like you’ve pressed pause on your old life, but you’re not yet settled into your new one. Because this kind of grief isn’t often acknowledged by others, it can feel lonely, confusing, or invalid. There’s no ceremony, no mourning period, and often no space to say: I’m grieving.

Have You Felt This Way?

Maybe you’ve found yourself crying unexpectedly after a video call home. Or feeling strangely numb during holidays you used to love.

Maybe you wonder:

Why do I feel so disconnected? 

or

Was this move a mistake?

You’re not weak, ungrateful, or overreacting. You’re navigating a very real emotional process, one that deserves compassion.

What Can You Do?

Here are some ways to support yourself through this invisible grief:

• Name it: Simply acknowledging “I’m grieving” can offer clarity and permission to feel.

• Connect with others who get it: Community with other expats can normalize what you’re going through.

• Create new rituals: Small traditions in your new life can offer stability and comfort.

• Allow joy and grief to coexist: You can love your new life and still miss your old one. Both can be true.

• Write letters (you don’t have to send them): To your past self, your home country, or people you miss.

How Can Sessions Help?

They offer a space where all of this can be named and processed without needing to “justify” your feelings. Together, we explore how your identity is shifting, how to hold space for the sadness without being consumed by it, and how to build a sense of emotional belonging within yourself and your new life. Because moving abroad isn’t just a relocation it’s a reconstruction of self, and that deserves to be held with care. And I should know, as I too relocated several times in my life and had my share of ambiguous loss, which makes me confident that I can empathize with you on a personal level and guide you through a professional one.