When You Can’t Relax Even on Vacation

Understanding Chronic Stress and Dysregulation

For many of us, vacation is a time to escape the pressures of daily life, relax, and recharge. But what happens when you’re on a beach in Bali or exploring the streets of Paris and yet still feel the heavy weight of stress? For some, even the most picturesque getaways don’t offer relief. This phenomenon can be a sign of chronic stress or dysregulation, which can make it difficult to unwind—even when there’s nothing demanding your attention.

Chronic Stress vs. Dysregulation

Chronic stress isn’t just about feeling overwhelmed by work or life responsibilities—it can be a constant, underlying sense of unease, even during times of relaxation. Over time, your body may become so accustomed to being in a heightened state of alertness that it can be hard to switch off.

Dysregulation refers to the difficulty in managing emotional responses. When your nervous system is dysregulated, it’s often stuck in “fight or flight” mode, making it nearly impossible to feel calm or at ease—even in a safe, relaxing environment.

For more detail on the fight or flight mode, please check out my first blog.

Tools for Calming the System

The good news is that it’s possible to calm your nervous system and start breaking the cycle of chronic stress. Here are some strategies to try:

1. Grounding Techniques: If you find yourself feeling anxious, grounding exercises can help you reconnect with the present moment. Try placing your feet flat on the ground and noticing your surroundings—what you can see, hear, and touch. This simple practice can bring you back into the here and now.

2. Breathing Exercises: While breathing exercises are commonly recommended, the key is to find one that works for you. For example, the “4-7-8” technique—inhale for 4 seconds, hold for 7, exhale for 8—can be helpful in calming the nervous system.

3. Progressive Muscle Relaxation: Tensing and releasing muscle groups from head to toe can help reduce the physical tension that often accompanies chronic stress.

4. Restorative Practices: Activities like yoga, meditation, or even mindful walking can help your body transition from a state of heightened stress to a calmer one.

5. Disconnect to Reconnect: Sometimes, the constant stimulation of our devices can contribute to stress. Try setting aside your phone or computer for a few hours each day to give your mind the break it deserves.

Remember, it’s normal to struggle with relaxation from time to time, especially if chronic stress has taken its toll. The first step is recognizing that your body may need time and care to regain its balance. Vacation or not, these tools can help you slowly reconnect to a sense of calm and peace, allowing you to enjoy the present moment more fully.